Sunday, February 1

Tough Love Hurts.

: ( Insert sad face here.


My poor kid. Jackster today. We went out to the store, Super Target again, and he was a very good boy ( for him!! ) and I bought him a big Etch A Sketch as he only has a tiny one and he loves it! He was thrilled with his new toy. I then went to the grocery store and the pet store and left the kids in the car, we ran by the library and dropped off some ( late ) books, then went to the mall. The kids LOVE Barnes and Nobles so we went there and I promised them ice cream from The Coldstone Creamery if they were good in B&N. Of course Jessie was good in B&N, she was BORN good in B&N. Jack, was not. Jack wasn't bad, but Jack ran off in the shop. Not once, not twice, but three times. I reminded him I would get him some ice cream if he was good and stayed with me in the store. I reminded him again that if he wanted ice cream he needed to stay with me. I gave him chances, I wanted him to succeed. He did not. We went to the ice cream store after the book store. Jessie got ice cream, I got ice cream, Jack did not get ice cream. He held my hand and looked at the choices and he was very quiet in the store. We came to leave and he asked me about his ice cream. I explained that I had told him he wouldn't have any if he ran off in the store.... I felt AWFUL. He said PLEEEEEEEASE. He kept saying "I'm a GOOD boy"..... We walked to the van and passed B&N again... he asked to go back in and be a good boy.... I told him I'm sure he would be good next time we went to the bookstore. Jessie felt so bad for him she asked if she could give him some of her ice cream. I said no. I kept telling him I knew he would be good next time. I kept telling myself and Jessie that I had wanted him to be successful, I wanted him to be happy, I felt deep sympathy for him.... sigh.....

Poor little boy.

The evening didn't get any better as sadly he also snapped his glasses totally in half on the way home and was saying "Darn IT" all the way back in between pleading for ice cream. He did get over it all, he helped with dinner, we chatted at the table, we cuddled and I stroked his back as he fell asleep...... However.....

Ugh.....

I feel I did what I had to do.... I'm sure there are parents out there who would not have put him in such a position, I'm sure they think I am wrong and evil.... I did what I thought was right. I tried to be understanding and compassionate, but I also tried to stick to my position.

I HATE parenting.

It's. So. Damn. HARD. and it hurts.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

You're a great mom! Don't be hard on yourself. You had a backbone and kept to your word. It sounds like you were empathetic and really tried to help him succeed. I hope the lesson sticks. Sorry about the glasses too!

(((hugs))) and thanks for posting the bad days along with the good. Hope today is better!

Anonymous said...

Tiff,
You did the right thing ! It's okay. You have to say what you mean and mean what you say . . . and you did. Praying tomorrow is a great day !
Hugs,
Susan

Keris Stainton said...

We've just had almost the exact same situation today, only in Borders not B&N! I wasn't as strong as you, I'm afraid. We didn't buy Harry the thing he wanted (model of the solar system), but we did buy him *something* (luminous planet stickers) because he was just so sad. When he says sorry it breaks my heart and I end up giving in, which I know is no good for any of us.

So don't feel guilty. You did the right thing and you've taught your son a valuable lesson. Now do you want to come and sort mine out? ;)